Lessons from a 5 year old

Every little girl at some point in her life wants to be a princess. She reads a book or sees a movie about princesses and aspires to be that when she grows up. Having a five year old running around my house everyday, I see this very clearly. Unicorns and fairies and this idea of a fairytale princess are all very real to her. When I asked her what a princess was, her answer melted my heart.
"Well Kiki," said the five year old very matter-of-factly, "A princess is a girl who does everything for everyone else without being mad, never fights with her brother or sister, is patient, is always pretty and sits up straight, and never makes mistakes."
I then asked the follow-up question, "Is it possible to never mess up?"
Her response was this, "No, but princesses apologize when then make mistakes and are really sorry for what they did. They also love everyone, so their hearts are sad when they make other people sad or angry."

This little girl, who most people would dismiss as talking about fairytales, has a point. Princesses are humble, loving, patient, always placing others above themselves, apologize quickly, and are tender-hearted towards others. Isn't this who we want the next generation to grow up to be?

As Christians, we are heirs of God. Or in more simple terms, princes and princesses. This imaginary girl in little girl's minds are exactly what God calls His children to be. A princess of God should be humble, loving, patient, always placing other above themselves, never hold a grudge, and be tender-hearted. Little girls should grow up to be fairytale princesses, except they are not fairytales.

One day, my little one will grow up and her main goal in life will not be to become a princess. I hope she can remember what a princess was and never give up that goal. I want to be that princess for her to show her that it is not just an idea in her head. No matter how old someone is, they should always be trying to become a princess like the one this five year old has in mind.

Letters

A dear friend and I have been writing letters to each other to give them whenever we see the other (or a sibling) next. These are not shallow, simple letters about things we talk about all the time in person. They are letters to one another that express how we are truly doing physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Most of the time they include crazy inside jokes and very colorful doodles as well, which is half the fun. :D

One of the letters I received, my friend was struggling with a lot, so naturally I made the reply as encouraging as I could. What I didn't realize was that I needed to hear that encouragement just as much as my friend did. After I delivered the letter through a sibling, I started thinking about the things I wrote and realized what a hypocrite I was. All of the stuff I wrote, I whole-heartedly meant, but was not doing myself. I needed to act upon what I was saying as well.

God used our little letters (I don't see them as that, but in the ultimate scheme of things, that is really what they are.) to show me how much I needed to change how I was living. I needed to do something impossible and live a life the Bible requires of a Christian. Without God, this is utterly hopeless. Thankfully, God sent His son to die for me and take upon my sin, so I can be saved. Through this God has enabled me to live a life of holiness. Not that I'm perfect, by any means, but now it is possible to do good. All to the glory of our great God who can do far more than I can start to dream or imagine!

Bananas

Friends are precious things. They make me smile, laugh, cry, and enjoy life in general. I am beyond blessed that my closest friends are all Christians and we can share in a love that is greater than anything anyone could ever imagine. The bond between us can never be broken and it is held together with the word of God.
With my group of friends, inside jokes are abounding. I could not even start to explain most of the inside jokes we have, but one is very special. Bananas. It is the type of love we share as friends. The type of love that only best friends can understand. The type of love that makes us more like siblings than friends. It is bananas. :)
As one of my dearest friends put it, "Love you to the moon of some far off planet where the aliens eat banana-bit shakes and sit by fireplaces until they laugh into eternity." This is our type of friendship. Weird, crazy, non-sensical, and full of joy and laughter.
Bananas. It's my type of friendship. :D

What Do I Know of Holy?

I heard a song the other day I have known for a long time, but this was the first time I really listened to the words.

I made You promises a thousand times
I've tried to hear from Heaven
But I talked the whole time
I think I made You too small
I never feared You at all, No
If You touched my face would I know You?
Looked into my eyes could I behold You?
 What do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
So what do I know? What do I know of Holy?
I guess I thought that I had figured You out
I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about
How You were mighty to save
But those were only empty words on a page
Then I caught a glimpse of who You might be
The slightest hint of You brought me down to my knees
 So what do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
So what do I know? What do I know of Holy?
 What do I know of Holy?
What do I know of wounds that will heal my shame?
And a God who gave life it's name?
What do I know of Holy?
Of the One who the angels praise?
All creation knows Your name
On earth and heaven above
What do I know of this love?
 So what do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
Lord what do I know? What do I know of Holy?

I have thought that I had figured God out and knew what was going on in my life. Everything was under control, except it was my control. I didn't think I needed God to do anything, but it was nice to know He was there if it became imperative. And then I hit a wall. I realized I knew nothing about God. I looked and felt like a Christian on the outside, but it meant nothing to me. God is patient and loving. I have experienced this myself more times than I can even start to explain. He waits for me to be all caught up in myself and trying to fix a problem there is no chance of me ever figuring out, then comes in a saves me over and over and over again. He shows me I need Him. I can't do anything without Him. This is a lesson I keep learning, and then forgetting and having to re-learn all over again. In all reality, what do I know of holy? Nothing. Not even a glimmer of what God's holiness looks like. It is unfathomable for my small human mind to comprehend. All I can do is fall to my knees and worship with all of my being.

There is no one holy like the Lord;
there is no one besides you;
there is no Rock like our God.

1 Samuel 2:2

A Peek Into Kiki's Brain

Anyone who has had a conversation with me is fully aware my brain works on a little different wave-length than most peoples. I get distracted very easily by very little and floccinaucinihilipilificate things (and I love finding ways to put that word in sentences!). This is because I am thinking and it might even be about the conversation. Almost always, I can connect what I was thinking about back to the conversation without trying too hard, but there are times it just doesn't work that way. Squirrels and sparkles, and sometimes sparkly squirrels, are a wonderful example of things I get distracted by that do not usually fit into the conversation.
A common reasoning for these distractions is that I love taking apart words, especially words I do not know the definition for, even if I can use it in a sentence correctly. Words are fun! This evidently goes along with my love for languages because most people I know do not do this in their brains naturally. This also happens while I am writing a word I do not know how to spell. I have to think through the roots to spell the word, but this can be very confusing and come up with laughable results.
A wonderful example is the word "Dominion."

Do-min-ion
noun
1. the power of the right of governing and controlling; sovereign authority.

It is usually pronounced duh-min-yuh-n, especially when said quickly. When I go to write this word, I take parts of the word I know how to spell already and work around that. In this case, -minion. The first part of the word though can be pronounced many ways and this causes me to create new pictures in my mind.

Da-minion: Gangster minion

Do-minion: also spelled dough minion

Duh-minion: which puts this image into my head.

In conclusion, my brain is weird. Do not question my brain. It likes minions, llamas, dance, and sparkly squirrels. It will automatically assume everything has to do with one of the above. :D

BEE-BO BEE-BO BEE-BO!!! (while doing chenae turns, spotting a llama, and laughing at the thought of a sparkly squirrel doing the same.)

How One Week Changed My Life

One week.

Sixteen staffers.

Eighty five students.

One huge, awesome God. 

This June, I had the amazing opportunity to serve as an intern with Worldview Academy. Interns are staff for one week, but have the help of a fully trained staffer to guide them through the crazy mayhem known as camp.

I went into the week full of excitement and fears, not sure what to expect, but there was no way I could have expected what God was going to do that week. 

God has been teaching me trust. Not just any kind of trust though. The full-out, nothing held back kind of trust. Being a perfectionist, this is not a simple task. Everything must be perfect, and since perfect is a relative term, I must be the one to do it. Well, God has other ideas, which of course are way better than mine (and way easier on my part!!!). Perfect is not relative to God. His perfection makes my version of perfect look silly. I cannot even start to compare to this. 

Now you are wondering how this relates to camp, I know.

Without trusting God, staffing with Worldview would be utterly impossible. Everyday is a trial in patience and strength. "Love the students unconditionally." If that happens, everything else will fall into place. This requires pouring every ounce, every drop of yourself into your small group. That means at the end of the day, you are exhausted physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Then the next morning, you get up and do it again with a smile on your face. No human being has the ability to do this, yet there were seventeen staffers, including myself, who did. Not through our own strength, but through trusting God for every ounce we needed on a minute-by-minute basis. 

There is not a better lesson in trust than this! 

There were many challenges throughout the week that made me look up rather than in. I am so thankful for the entire staff team who were there to remind me of this, but especially to the staffer that worked with me, because she always reminded me to trust God with every little thing. She was an amazing example of a servant leader and encouraged me greatly with her willingness to serve God with all that she is. 

As wonderful as the staff were, the students were fantastic! By far my favorite part of being an intern was watching them grow emotionally and spiritually. It was amazing to see how God worked in them throughout the week and to see them make connections between the gospel and their lives. This is the reason to staff. Not because it looks fun, or sounds like a cool challenge, or even because of the community that is evident within the staff. It is to love students with everything that you are. To give your life to God and let Him work through you in students' lives. It is to glorify God. 

The week I interned at Worldview Academy changed my life. It taught me what true trust is and how to serve even when there is nothing left in me. 

"Oh Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!" Psalm 8:9

Happy birthday Rebekah!!!

Today is someone's birthday, birthday, birthday.
Today is someone's birthday, I wonder whose it is?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY REBEKAH!!!

I am truly blessed to be one of your friends and get to see you all of the time. You are an amazing and beautiful young lady and I cannot wait for the upcoming years of being your friend.

Dance Recital

The anticipation, hard work, and blisters finally paid off!! Dance recital at Rialto was amazing. A week and a half of tech week. More blisters than I could imagine, even on the bottom of my feet. Soreness that is inexpressible. Long nights at the studio. Hours and hours of rehearsal. All of this for one night and four dances on one giant, beautiful stage. And it was totally worth it!
"America" opened the show. It was my ballet routine. I loved it so much, except for the end with the flags. That was really, really hard to learn and hurt a lot. Our costumes were beautiful blue and red tu-tu's (depending on our class) with silver sparkles.
"Pride and Prejudice" was my second dance. This was pointe. My favorite dance of the night was this one. I was most nervous for pointe because there is a lot more a person can mess up when dancing on pointe shoes, but it went well, according to everyone else. I thought I messed up a lot, but it didn't show, for that I am thankful. Our costumes for pointe were orange, pink, or blue depending on our level. Mine was orange. It had gold and brown mixed in and a sheer sparkly overlay over our leotards. It looked gorgeous on stage!
"These Boots are made for Walkin'" was my third dance and my least favorite. Tap has never really been my favorite style of dance, but I do enjoy it every once in a while. Our costumes were pink sparkly plaid tank tops, with frilly, almost flapper-style. shorts. I didn't love the costume, but it was better than I thought it was going to be. ;)
My last dance was the finale. We danced to the Kidz Bop version of "Uptown Funk." I loved it!!! Even though I hate jazz with a passion, it was so much fun to learn and to perform with all of my friends. Most of us were not taking the dance too seriously and were laughing at ourselves and each other throughout the whole routine. This made it amazing.

Now for the fun part. Pictures!!!!

Me and my daddy after recital.

Nothing like full stage make-up!!!

My "America" costume.
Photo credit to Capture
the Canvas Photography.

All my amazing friends who came to see the show!

"Pride and Prejudice" costume.
Photo credit to Capture the Canvas
Photography

Me and my beautiful Auntie Em., who flew out just for recital! :D

A Visit with Grandma

My grandma on my dad's side came into town to visit and come to my graduation and dance recital. It was really, really nice having her here and being able to spend so much time with her.

Eating at Cracker Barrel, her favorite
restaurant. 

Getting a pedicure for the fist time. ;D

Just hanging out. 

Graduation

High school is now a thing of the past. YIPEE!!!! 

Being homeschooled, I had the choice of what to do for my graduation. I could do a classic graduation ceremony with the cap and gown, or I could just throw a huge party. I chose the latter. :D

I invited a whole bunch of my friends and family and we all met at a park and had food. Four of my very dear friends shared stories and advice, which I truly enjoyed. We had tacos and played games and overall just enjoyed fellowshiping with each other. 

Happy belated birthday Nunkey girl!!!

My little Nunkey is 5!!! Where did my sweet 1 1/2 year old go?

Playing at Pilcher Park and climbing trees.

Park time!

Smiles. :)

Butterfly treats for dance class.

Happy  birthday Isabella!!!

Happy belated birthdays!

Happy 16th birthday Katherine!!!

You are a precious gem, full of joy and laughter. I love you!

Happy birthday Mommy!!!

I love you all the way to the stars and the moon and back!

What I've Been Up To

Life is crazy as always in my little world. 

In January I applied to be staff at Worldview, and a few weeks ago I received the news. I was accepted!!!! I am an intern, which means I only staff for one week and it is with another staff member. I am super-duper excited!!!!!

Dance has been dance. Busy as all can be with recital not that far off now. Right now I would have to say ballet is the hardest dance, because we have several different parts going on at the same time and remembering them all is quite the challenge. Pointe is pretty easy, besides being pointe. Ms. Jodi-Ann had all of us switch to gel pads in our shoes rather than lambs wool bunnies. They feel really strange and a little gross at first. The gel squishes between my toes and I really, really don't like that sensation. They do feel a little better than the wool bunnies once I am en pointe though, so I guess I can't complain too much. :) 

Bella is...well...Bella. Last night she was climbing her dresser (don't know why) and it fell and she broke her pinky finger. She is doing okay with it, but it really hurts and her whole right arm is wrapped and in a sling, which she does not like. Her doctor's appointment was today to figure out whether it is going to be splinted or cast and when that was going to be done. Hopefully she will be much happier on Monday. 

We have been going to the zoo once a week and Bella has been loving it!!! We took some friends this past week and she was so excited the whole day. I liked being able to have some older kids there too, because usually it is just me, my mom, and Bella, and the zoo gets really repetitive. Bella's favorite animals are the dolphins. But her most favorite thing to do at the zoo is not look at the animals, it is to ride the carousel. We rode it twice last time, just because we could. :)

That is pretty much everything going on in my world right now. 

More craziness to come later...

Just an Update

Life is pretty normal in my world right now.
Nunkey girl is doing lots of preschool. She is almost reading and doing double-digits in math right now. She can also write her name in lowercase now.
Dance is going well. As far as I know, we still do not have our costumes for any of our dances. We are starting choreography for our ballet routine this week, after core conditioning. :) (I am not sure how to put a sarcastic smile using emoticons.)
My senior year school work is also going pretty well. I only have to do one thing. Math. I only work on it once or twice a month, but I will still finish in plenty of time for my graduation.

1 Corinthians 4:6

For it is the God who commanded light to shine out of darkness, who has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.

I have been thinking about this verse a lot lately and it is awesome to me how the same God who created the world and said, "Let there be light." showed a different kind of light in our hearts. The light of His glory, He never had to do that, but He chose to because of His wonderful love for us. 

200 posts!!!! (well...201 now)

After I published my last post, I realized it was my 200th post!!! That is a lot of blogging, at least for me. :D

I thought about maybe doing something special for this post, but my 200th post was extremely special. It was pictures of one of the top five things I care most about. My little minion. She is a precious little jewel and I love her dearly. I cannot think of anything better to have. :D

Adventures in Nunkeyland

A little four year old has been very busy recently. Here are her pictures from her adventures. :D

(sorry the pictures are a little out of order. They were not cooperating very well and uploaded in a weird order.)

Pointe

Pointe is a style of dance that some people think you have to be crazy to do and I have to agree. I mean honestly, who wants to purposely get blisters and have sore feet all the time? Evidently, I do. Some people have asked me what the purpose of dancing on pointe is when it is just ballet in a more painful form. They are right, in a sense. It is a form of ballet and it is more painful, but it is so much more than that. For me pointe was always the biggest goal I could have in dance. Pointe dancers are the ones the little girls look up to and try to sneak peeks of our rehearsals because they want to be just like us. Pointe means not just being an average ballerina, there are thousands of those, but being exceptional. Yes, there are also thousands of pointe dancers, but few honestly enjoy it. Even out of the thirteen in my class there are three of us who really love to come to class each week.

I got my first pair of pointe shoes last winter/spring. In order to get pointe shoes, you have to be fitted because there are many different kinds of shoes and they have to find the best kind for your feet. I remember being quite nervous to go on pointe, but once I did I couldn't stop smiling. I felt like I was flying! What I didn't realize was how much more I would learn to do. Since starting class at the end of August, I can now walk around on pointe, spin on pointe, and do a whole bunch of things in ballet that change once pointe shoes are put into the equation. Some of the simplest things in ballet are changed to accommodate the pointe shoes and make it look beautiful. I can also do several kinds of jumps, which are complicated. I don't land jumps in pointe, or start them on pointe for that matter, but it changes the weighting of your feet (not that there is a wood box on the end of your foot or anything like that!) and it makes some jumps harder and some A LOT easier.

In summary, yes, pointe is painful and miserable sometimes (okay, painful all of the time, miserable some of the time) but it is amazing. I don't know if any pointe dancer can explain why they love it and are willing to push past the pain and misery and work up to the expectations placed for them once they have pointe shoes, I love it and that is all I can say. Pointe makes me feel happy and on top of the world. Maybe I don't need an explanation for that except God gave me a gift for dance and I am enjoying it to the fullest.

Catching up

Of course, right after I say I have the goal of posting something every week at least, I don't post anything for quite a while. :) That's life sometimes.

There is not too much out of the ordinary going on in my world. I stopped guitar because it was getting to be too much in my crazy schedule and was always the last thing I practiced. I am still playing, I am just not taking lessons for a while. I have found out the theme of my dance recital and know the songs for all three of my dances. The only songs I don't know are the intro and finale, but I won't find those out until the week before show more than likely. For pointe I am dancing to the "Pride and Prejudice theme" from the 1995 version. For ballet we are doing "America" by Neil Diamond and for tap it is "These Boots are made for Walkin'" by Jessica Simpson from the "Dukes of Hazzard" movie. I only really like the song for pointe, but the ballet dance is going to be really pretty, so I cannot complain too much. I can think of a lot worse songs we could be performing to. I have the "Pride and Prejudice" them on repeat in my room most of the day because I love it so much. :)

Sharyssa spent the weekend this past week because her parents were out of town. We had a lot of fun and talked a lot! Monday morning we went to Panera and got to sit by ourselves and feel all grown up. It was quite enjoyable.

I got a new computer. It is a pinkish purple and is pretty small, significantly smaller than my old one. I love it!!! Bella named it "Raspberry" because of it's color.

Speaking of Bella, she has been doing well. Her dance for recital is a penguin dance for the theme of "March of the Penguins." I can't wait to see her costume! She has started a math book and is doing really well. In the past two weeks, she has done five weeks worth of math! I think she likes it just a little bit. We took her ice skating just for fun and it turned out the day we took her was the day after she found out about her recital piece, so we told her it was studying to be a penguin. :D She loved it, but got tired pretty quickly because of the amount of energy she exerted every time her feet started moving. It was really cute though and she did really well for it being her first time on ice skates. I might post pictures later if I think about it.

This post has been much longer than I thought it was going to be. Oh well, I guess my life might be a little busier than I thought.

Until next time!

Lauren

I know I have not been on my blog much this month, but my life is crazy busy and I sometimes forget about the little things.

Please, please be praying for a friend of a friend. I only met her briefly, but I know because God made her, she is a precious jewel and highly valued. Her name is Lauren and she is fifteen years old. Tuesday night she had a brain aneurysm and went into a coma. She remains in this coma now.

Please also be praying for her parents and siblings, especially her twin sister. I cannot even start to imagine how they are all feeling right now.

New Year's Resolutions-ish

One of my very close friends asked me yesterday if I had any new year's resolutions and I said no. Now that I have been thinking about it, I think it is rather depressing not to have any goals for this year. I guess I don't call them resolutions more than I do call them goals.

My New Year's Resolutions for 2015:

• Read through the whole Bible
• Post on my blog once a week (at least)
• Listen to more classical music
• Learn to do a tour jete on both feet (with and without pointe shoes)
• Live everyday for God's glory
• Keep a consistent quiet time
• Move up a level in ballet
• Move up a level in piano
• Graduate

I don't know how feasible all of these are, but they are my goals and I will do my best to keep all of them.

Kosovo

When I did my highlights of the year, I left a huge something out. Now I am glad I did because I can dedicate a whole post to it.

I went out of the country to the first time to Kosovo. I went with some close friends and to a school where I know the owner. Instead of re-posting everything that I put on my other blog, here is the link to the post.

My outlook on life is different from when I left and I could not be happier that I went. Now I know my calling is to work overseas with young children and to spread the gospel everywhere I can.

New Years Day 2015

Most years at my house, New Years isn't really celebrated all that much. We do some small things, but nothing extravagant. Usually a lot of sleeping is involved. This year was a little different though.

When I got up it was a little bit after 10 o'clock in the morning, which is extreme sleeping in for me. Dad had to go to work for a while, so I thought it would be pretty calm until he got home. I was wrong. We cleaned the entire house. Almost all of the laundry go done, all of the dishes we done and the cabinets wiped off, the kitchen floor got cleaned and I had the joyous job of folding all of the laundry that was accumulating in the living room. The laundry was more interesting than the kitchen stuff because I got to watch TV while I folded everything. My room had a little bit of work left to do, so I almost finished it up. There is still a small amount of dusting that needs done, but other than that my entire room is finished.

After lunch, Caleb and I went to a friend's New Years open house. We got to stay for quite a while a visit with all of our friends that were there. I had a lot of fun (and joy)! While I was there, I got a phone call asking if I could watch the nunkey and her siblings for a while that night. Bella was rather insistent on me coming, and it is very hard to say no to her when she is saying how much she dearly loves me and wants to see me soon.

I got to go home for a little bit and get changed into clothing that was more comfortable for babysitting in, then they picked me up and I went and watched the kiddos for a bit. All the kids showed me their Christmas presents and told me about their vacation after Christmas. After a short game of hide and seek, the kids all wanted to take a break and lay on the couch. The oldest two fell asleep, so I just had Bella for a while. She was very happy for the one on one time, which she spent snuggling.

I highly enjoyed the first day of the new year, especially since I got to spend it with friends and my nunkey girl.